Steel Pride

Logline:

Shame twisted him. Now he preserves love in blood and latex.

SYNOPSIS:

In the gritty, blue-collar heart of Pittsburgh, mutilated bodies of queer men begin to surface—each victim carefully posed, their hearts removed and preserved in condoms.

As panic quietly spreads through the LGBTQ+ community, forensic pathologist Dr. Natalie Rourke uncovers a disturbing pattern: the killer isn’t motivated by hate, but by a twisted longing for connection. Enter Mason, a soft-spoken survivor of one such attack who never came forward—until the nightmares returned. With his repressed memories and Natalie’s forensic insight, they begin to piece together a chilling truth: the killer, Grant Hemminger, is a tormented man hiding in plain sight, murdering those who made him feel emotionally seen. Shame, trauma, and unprocessed queer identity have shaped his psyche into something ritualistic and deadly. As the city prepares for its annual Pride Parade, the hunt becomes urgent. Grant, unraveling under the weight of memory and obsession, plans his final “offering” amid the crowd. What he doesn’t anticipate is Mason—the one who smiled at him and lived—stepping back into view. In a haunting confrontation beneath rainbow banners and candlelight, love, violence, and grief collide. The community may bleed, but it will not be erased.

Script Coverage Report

TITLE: STEEL PRIDE

AUTHOR: David Williamson

DRAFT: Second Draft

DATE: March 28, 2025

PAGES: 93

GENRE: Psychological Thriller / Crime Drama

SUBMITTED: For consideration

Logline

A brilliant but obsessive forensic profiler hunts a ritualistic serial killer who preserves his victims' hearts in condoms as a token of twisted affection. When a survivor disrupts the killer's pattern, she must race to stop him before he turns Pittsburgh's Pride parade into a public massacre built on a lifetime of repressed trauma.

Synopsis

The script opens on a visceral, horrifying scene: GRANT HEMMINGER (30s), a city maintenance worker, is murdering JASON, a young man he met on Grindr. In a quiet, reverent ritual, Grant carves out Jason’s heart and carefully seals it inside a condom, whispering about keeping the moment "warm" and "moist." This act is juxtaposed with flashbacks to Grant's youth, where his violently homophobic father shames and abuses him, instilling a deep-seated belief that he is unworthy of love.

DR. NATALIE ROURKE, a fiercely intelligent but emotionally guarded forensic specialist, and the gruff DETECTIVE GIVENS are assigned the case. While Givens sees a gruesome but standard murder, Natalie immediately recognizes the profound psychological symbolism. She interprets the killer’s M.O. not as an act of hate, but as a "love letter"—a desperate attempt to preserve a fleeting moment of perceived connection.

As Grant’s killing spree continues with victims DARIUS and CAM, a pattern emerges. He leaves behind the condom-wrapped heart and a cryptic message related to the "intimacy" he felt ("YOU SMILED AT ME"). Natalie builds her profile: the killer is addicted to the idea of intimacy. He seeks men who make him feel seen, and then kills them to freeze that perfect, uncontaminated moment before reality—and potential rejection—can set in.

The narrative's turning point arrives when Grant targets MASON (26). The ritual is shattered when Mason, alerted by a "friend check-in" on his phone, fights back and escapes, becoming the first survivor. This rupture sends Grant into a psychological spiral; his carefully constructed world, which relied on passive victims, has been broken. Mason, though deeply traumatized, provides Natalie with a living witness, confirming her profile of a man desperate for "warmth" and "safety."

Natalie's investigation leads her to a defunct LGBTQ+ Health Center's records, where she finds a 2004 intake form for a violent, withdrawn patient who was never followed up on: Grant Hemminger. With a name and a clear history of systemic failure, the manhunt intensifies. Grant, meanwhile, becomes pathologically obsessed with Mason, the one who saw him and survived.

The final act builds to a ticking-clock climax set during Pittsburgh’s Pride parade. Grant, having left a video message vowing to "give back" the feelings he stole, plans to turn the celebration of visibility into an act of mass terror. He embeds himself in the parade as a volunteer, a "wolf in color." While Natalie directs a frantic city-wide effort to find him, Mason, realizing he is the key, hunts for Grant himself.

Their inevitable, brutal confrontation takes place amidst the chaos of the parade. It is both a physical and emotional showdown, with Grant screaming that Mason was "supposed to end it" for him. Just as Grant gains the upper hand, Natalie arrives and shoots him. Grant dies not in agony, but with a look of vacant release, his lifelong performance of pain finally over.

In the epilogue, the community gathers for a vigil, grieving but unbroken. Mason, bruised but resolute, leaves a note at a memorial that reads "YOU DIDN't WIN." Natalie files the case under two categories: "Hate Crimes" and, more pointedly, "Mental Illness — Complicity of Silence." The final image is a blood-stained rainbow ribbon, untied and fluttering from a fence.

Comments

CONCEPT:

"STEEL PRIDE" is a powerful, high-concept thriller with exceptional depth. The central hook—a killer who preserves his victims' hearts in condoms—is both viscerally disturbing and a brilliant, unforgettable metaphor for the story's core themes. It elevates the script beyond a standard serial killer procedural into a haunting exploration of trauma, intimacy, and loneliness. The premise is commercial, dark, and possesses a rare intellectual and emotional weight.

CHARACTERS:

The character work is the script's greatest strength.

Grant Hemminger is a masterfully drawn antagonist. He is terrifying not because he is a monster, but because he is a profoundly broken human being. The flashbacks to his abusive childhood provide a clear, tragic source for his pathology without excusing his horrific actions. His desire isn't for death but for a form of connection so pure it can only exist as a preserved relic. This makes him one of the most compelling and pitiable screen villains in recent memory.

Dr. Natalie Rourke is a sharp, effective protagonist. She serves as the audience's guide into the killer's psyche, and her clinical obsession is balanced by a subtle, palpable empathy for the loneliness that drives him. She avoids the cliché of the damaged detective; her armor is intellectual, and her final classification of the case as a "complicity of silence" provides a powerful thematic statement.

Mason is the heart of the story. His arc from terrified victim to resilient survivor and, ultimately, to the hero of his own story is immensely satisfying. He refuses to be defined by his trauma, and his active pursuit of Grant in the third act gives the narrative a powerful sense of agency and hope. His emotional journey provides the perfect counterweight to Grant’s despair.

STRUCTURE & PACING:

The script is professionally structured with relentless forward momentum. The three-act structure is clear and effective. The cold open immediately hooks the reader, and the initial murders establish Grant's ritualistic pattern with chilling precision. The disruption caused by Mason’s survival in the second act perfectly raises the stakes and shifts the narrative from a "whodunit" to a "why-does-he-do-it" and "how-do-we-stop-him." The final act, set against the vibrant, chaotic backdrop of the Pride parade, is a brilliantly conceived ticking-clock scenario that is both visually dynamic and thematically resonant. The use of flashbacks and intercuts is seamless and always serves to illuminate character and heighten tension.

DIALOGUE:

The dialogue is lean, sharp, and purposeful. Grant’s whispered, reverent lines during his rituals are skin-crawling. Natalie's dialogue is precise and analytical, revealing her character through her professional observations. Mason’s lines convey a journey from fear to a quiet, hard-won strength. There is no wasted space; every line pushes the story forward or deepens our understanding of the characters.

THEME:

This is a thematically rich screenplay. It masterfully explores the perversion of intimacy, the cyclical nature of trauma, and the failures of the systems meant to protect the vulnerable. More importantly, it is a profound story about being "seen"—and the difference between being a spectacle and being truly understood. While set against a backdrop of violence in the queer community, the ultimate theme is one of resilience, community, and the refusal to let trauma have the final word.

MARKETABILITY:

While the subject matter is dark and graphically violent, the script has strong commercial potential. It sits comfortably alongside successful high-concept thrillers like Se7en and The Silence of the Lambs, but with a contemporary, socially relevant angle. The unique M.O., the compelling villain, and the strong protagonist arcs make for a marketable package. It would attract A-list talent for the roles of Grant, Natalie, and Mason, and a director with a strong visual and psychological sensibility (e.g., Denis Villeneuve, David Fincher, Luca Guadagnino).

Verdict

RECOMMEND

"STEEL PRIDE" is an exceptional piece of writing. It is a confident, disturbing, and profoundly moving thriller that transcends its genre trappings to become a powerful statement on trauma and human connection. With a brilliant concept, meticulously crafted characters, and a gripping, high-stakes plot, this script is ready for development. It has the potential to be a critically acclaimed and commercially successful film.