Pizza Boyz

Logline:

In a crumbling Rust Belt pizza shop, an anxious philosophy graduate and a reckless prankster spiral through escalating chaos as they fight to save their dying workplace, confront their toxic friendship, and maybe—just maybe—find purpose in the wreckage of their lives.

SYNOPSIS:

In a decaying Rust Belt town, two mismatched pizza delivery drivers — Joel, a bitter philosophy grad stuck in a dead-end job, and Richie, a prank-loving burnout terrified of growing up — spiral through a series of outrageous schemes, humiliating stunts, and desperate fights to keep their beloved but failing pizza shop alive. As they battle rival pizza joints, sleazy debt collectors, and their own worst impulses, the Pizza Boyz discover that sometimes friendship, failure, and a hot slice of pizza are the only things holding your life together.

SCRIPT COVERAGE REPORT

TITLE: Pizza Boyz

AUTHOR: David Williamson

DRAFT: Second Draft

DATE: May 4, 2025

PAGE COUNT: 176

GENRE: Comedy / Drama

LOGLINE: A long-suffering philosophy grad, tormented by his prank-obsessed coworker at a failing pizzeria, must orchestrate an elaborate revenge plot to save both the restaurant and his own dignity.

RECOMMENDATION: CONSIDER

SYNOPSIS

JOEL, an over-educated and under-employed philosophy graduate, is trapped in a Sisyphean loop of delivering mediocre pizza and enduring endless humiliation from his coworker, RICHIE. Richie, a wannabe social media star, uses Joel as the perpetual victim for his "Pizza Freaks" livestream channel, culminating in a cruel prank where Joel is handcuffed to a chair on stage during a strip club's male revue night.

The backdrop for this toxic friendship is Tuscany's Pizza, a struggling local institution run by the tough, grieving widow DEBBIE. The restaurant is on the brink of foreclosure, a fact Debbie tries to hide from her misfit staff, which includes the stoic, mysteriously skilled dough-maker OMAR and the sharp, androgynous NICO.

When the financial crisis becomes undeniable, the team learns Debbie plans to sell to the soulless corporate chain "Pizza Planet." Faced with the end of their dysfunctional world, Joel steps up. Spurred by a surprising suggestion from Omar to use the restaurant founder's original, high-quality recipes, the crew decides to hold a 30th-anniversary fundraiser to save Tuscany's.

As they plan, the power dynamic shifts. Joel begins to anticipate and foil Richie's pranks, gaining confidence. However, their efforts are catastrophically derailed when a health inspector, BARTON, makes a surprise visit. A flour-trap booby-trap Richie set for Joel in the freezer accidentally douses Barton, leading to the restaurant being shut down for six weeks.

With all hope seemingly lost, Debbie fires Richie and prepares to sign the restaurant away. But Joel, refusing to give up, rallies the team for a last-ditch fundraiser in the parking lot. The community response is overwhelming, and they raise nearly enough money to save the restaurant. In a moment of genuine teamwork, the crew, including a remorseful Richie, successfully convinces the Health Department Director to grant them a provisional reopening.

This victory, however, doesn't erase years of torment. Having finally found his footing, Joel secretly enlists Nico and a trio of savvy strip club dancers—AMBER, BRITTANY, and SHAY—to execute a final, elaborate revenge plot. They lure Richie to the strip club with the promise of a meeting with a powerful streaming executive. There, they turn the tables, forcing Richie into the same "humiliation chair" to confront the emotional, not physical, consequences of his actions. In a moment of catharsis, Richie offers a genuine, heartfelt apology. Joel, having sought recognition over revenge, accepts.

In the end, Tuscany's is thriving. Joel is the new Assistant Manager, and a more mature Richie is the "Social Media Manager." Their relationship is reset on equal terms. The film closes with the entire Tuscany's "family" celebrating their victory by getting on stage together, joyfully making fools of themselves by choice.

COMMENTS

"Pizza Boyz" is a genuinely funny, heartfelt, and cleverly constructed comedy with a fantastic ensemble of characters and a highly commercial premise. It successfully blends low-brow prank humor with surprisingly high-brow philosophical themes, creating a unique and memorable voice. The script's greatest strengths are its character arcs and sharp dialogue, but it is held back by a significant structural issue: its length.

CONCEPT & PREMISE

The concept is excellent. A workplace comedy set in a failing pizza joint is a classic, relatable setup. The addition of the toxic prankster friendship, the social media/viral video angle, and the protagonist's background in philosophy gives the story a fresh, modern edge. The central theme—the search for dignity and purpose in a seemingly dead-end life—is resonant and provides a strong emotional core. The character of Steve, the gas station cashier who quotes Camus and Nietzsche, is a brilliant device that elevates the script's themes from subtext to text in a consistently hilarious way.

PLOT & STRUCTURE

The script follows a classic three-act structure with well-defined turning points. The stakes are consistently and effectively raised, from personal humiliation (the strip club) to professional jeopardy (foreclosure) to catastrophic failure (the health department shutdown). The "ticking clock" of the Pizza Planet deal provides excellent narrative momentum in the second and third acts.

The climax is a masterstroke of screenwriting. The "revenge" plot is beautifully subverted; Joel's goal isn't to humiliate Richie but to force him to feel empathy. This makes the resolution emotionally satisfying and earned, transforming a simple revenge comedy into a more mature story about friendship and growth.

The script's primary, and most significant, weakness is its page count. At 176 pages, it is exceptionally long for a comedy, which should ideally run between 90-110 pages. The current length suggests a 3-hour film, which would cripple the pacing. The script contains several redundant scenes and beats that, while often funny in isolation, slow the story down. For example, the fundraiser planning is discussed multiple times, and the initial setup of the restaurant's financial troubles could be condensed. A rigorous, page-one rewrite is needed to distill the narrative to its essential, most impactful moments. The story is here, but it needs to be found within a much tighter structure.

CHARACTERS

The characters are the heart and soul of this script and its greatest strength.

JOEL is a fantastic protagonist. His transformation from a passive, resentful victim to an assertive, capable leader is compelling and believable. His ability to apply philosophical concepts to practical problems (using chemistry to defeat super glue, using strategy to out-think Richie) is a wonderful and unique character trait.

RICHIE is a perfectly crafted antagonist—annoying and destructive, but ultimately driven by insecurity and a desperate need for validation. He isn't a villain so much as a man-child, which makes his eventual apology and redemption feel earned.

The supporting cast is an absolute delight. DEBBIE is more than a "tough boss"; her grief and fierce desire to protect her husband's legacy give her depth. OMAR is a brilliant creation, a man of few words whose stoicism hides a deep well of pride, loyalty, and culinary genius. NICO serves as the perfect catalyst, the sharp-witted friend who pushes Joel to finally act. The unlikely alliance with the strip club dancers is a highlight, as they are written as smart, capable women who are instrumental to the plot.

DIALOGUE

The dialogue is sharp, witty, and perfectly tailored to each character. The contrast between Joel's articulate frustration, Richie's empty-headed "content" slang, and Steve's deadpan existentialism is a constant source of humor. The banter feels authentic to a dysfunctional workplace family. The script is packed with laugh-out-loud moments and memorable one-liners. Like the plot, the dialogue could benefit from being tightened in places to improve the overall pace, but its quality is undeniable.

CONCLUSION

"Pizza Boyz" is a script with tremendous potential. It's a crowd-pleasing story with strong commercial appeal, memorable characters, and a genuinely moving emotional core. It has the DNA of a successful, modern comedy classic. However, the excessive page count is a serious impediment that must be addressed before it can be considered for production. With a significant and disciplined trim to bring it down to a standard feature length, this script could be a real winner. The writer clearly has talent, and the story and characters are too strong to ignore.